The News

She ran into my room and literally skidded to a stop.

"Did you hear the news?"

I didn't look up from my work.

"Which country blew up?"

"What?"

"Sorry, I assumed you'd only bother me if it was terrible news. Which lottery did I win?"

"What?"

"Well, if it's not incredible good news, nor incredible bad news, we're left with news that is merely good, bad, or intermediate. And in none of those cases, does it warrant you disturbing me. But since you're here, what is it?"

"That guy you really hate died."

"...

So the answer was Grim Reaper's lottery."