Last Night's Conversation

Actual conversation I had (in my head) last night.

*Power goes out*

Me: Huh.

My Brain: Welp, no Drabble tonight.

Me: Wait, what? It's only like 10:30, my phone has a decent amount of battery power left!

My Brain: Nope, no Drabble.

Me: I'm already a few days without one-

My Brain: Well one more won't matter, will it!

Me: No, sorry, I've got nothing else to do but this, this is like perfect storm to focus and do a Drabble! Give me one actually good reason why we shouldn't do one!

My brain: ...It's hot.

Me: ...Fair enough.

Wished Out

The Genie understood the concept of the Internet fairly quickly, but they were quickly blown away once I showed them the message boards dedicated to trying to outsmart wish givers like them and all their tricks.

"So you understand my asking all those questions."

"But... these 'Jackass Genies', they don't exist! We grant wishes as they're requested!"

"And when people are unhappy or it comes at a price or-"

"Humanity's inability to foresee problems or know their desires isn't a fault with us!"

"So you'll treat my wish fair?"

"Granted."

I argued my new hair color was proof of concept.

Simple Sounding Question

She asked me a simple sounding question. 

But how to answer it without a long, complicated answer? How could I possibly tell the truth without explaining about all that came before her, all the pain and the mental scars that had developed because of it. How could I answer what she thought was a simple question honestly without baring everything that I was?

It wasn't possible. So I told her a simple sounding lie.

I sometimes think about where she might be now. I hope she's happy, truly. I'm not, obviously, but I wasn't before, so I'm used to it.

To Be The Best

"Great work team!"

As the kid put his fighting creatures back in their pocket homes, he turned to his defeated foe, still cradling their unconscious bug.

"You do realise you can have multiple fighters, right?"

The kid wasn't sure what came over them to say that, pity maybe, but they weren't prepared for the fury in the gaze they got directed at them.

"You do realise most of us have responsibilities that mean we can't travel around, nor the funds to feed a bunch of different creatures?"

The kid paused.

"Speaking of funds..."

The foe glared, reaching for his wallet.

Velvet

He came inside in a hurry, with the doorguy only letting him by since he was a regular.

'Velvet' was luckily just coming on shift, since the way he approached her, if she had been talking to anyone, they'd have been interrupted quite rudely.

"Hey Steve, how-"

"Was it genuine?"

'Velvet' blinked.

"I'm sorry?"

"Our... What we have. Had. Was it genuine?"

"Oh baby, I-"

"I need the truth. Please."

After a moment, Judy answered.

"I mean, you seem ok, but..."

He nodded, and then walked out.

After she saw the news, she was glad he accepted the truth elsewhere.

Not The Point

The Angel rubbed what I suppose was its temples.

"Ok, I think I understand how you got to Hell, and why Lucy got you to think up new punishments. But go over what happened next again."

"Sure, they gave me the remit to increase the pain generated in overall terms, ideally while also reducing expenditure. And as I explained, the fire and brimstone approach had rapidly diminishing returns, as opposed to the consistent spread of boredom and nothingness."

"Right, but then..."

"Well the lesser demons complained, they weren't having any fun.

So by switching to harvesting from them, production tripled."

Steer Clear

I had stayed alive by warning others of death.

That is, there would be a few small groups a month that would arrive on the island with grand designs to be the ones to final enter the caves and defeat the evil beneath it and claim the treasure. And I'd warn them not to. A few would listen, most wouldn't. A few would cast detection spells on me, thinking I was part of it, most didn't. But I wasn't, I avoided the caves like the plague, nothing to do with me.

I just lived off selling second hand boats, mostly.