To Be The Best

"Great work team!"

As the kid put his fighting creatures back in their pocket homes, he turned to his defeated foe, still cradling their unconscious bug.

"You do realise you can have multiple fighters, right?"

The kid wasn't sure what came over them to say that, pity maybe, but they weren't prepared for the fury in the gaze they got directed at them.

"You do realise most of us have responsibilities that mean we can't travel around, nor the funds to feed a bunch of different creatures?"

The kid paused.

"Speaking of funds..."

The foe glared, reaching for his wallet.

Velvet

He came inside in a hurry, with the doorguy only letting him by since he was a regular.

'Velvet' was luckily just coming on shift, since the way he approached her, if she had been talking to anyone, they'd have been interrupted quite rudely.

"Hey Steve, how-"

"Was it genuine?"

'Velvet' blinked.

"I'm sorry?"

"Our... What we have. Had. Was it genuine?"

"Oh baby, I-"

"I need the truth. Please."

After a moment, Judy answered.

"I mean, you seem ok, but..."

He nodded, and then walked out.

After she saw the news, she was glad he accepted the truth elsewhere.

Not The Point

The Angel rubbed what I suppose was its temples.

"Ok, I think I understand how you got to Hell, and why Lucy got you to think up new punishments. But go over what happened next again."

"Sure, they gave me the remit to increase the pain generated in overall terms, ideally while also reducing expenditure. And as I explained, the fire and brimstone approach had rapidly diminishing returns, as opposed to the consistent spread of boredom and nothingness."

"Right, but then..."

"Well the lesser demons complained, they weren't having any fun.

So by switching to harvesting from them, production tripled."

Steer Clear

I had stayed alive by warning others of death.

That is, there would be a few small groups a month that would arrive on the island with grand designs to be the ones to final enter the caves and defeat the evil beneath it and claim the treasure. And I'd warn them not to. A few would listen, most wouldn't. A few would cast detection spells on me, thinking I was part of it, most didn't. But I wasn't, I avoided the caves like the plague, nothing to do with me.

I just lived off selling second hand boats, mostly.

Back

Back.

"-and you'll never-"

Jump to the left.

They shoot. They hit.

Back.

"-and you'll never-"

Jump rightwards.

They shoot, they hit.

Back.

"-and you'll never ever-"

Slide.

They shoot, they hit.

Back.

"-and you'll-"

Throw a knife.

They duck, they shoot, they hit.

Back.

"-and you'll never-"

"Can't we-"

"No."

They shoot, they hit.

Back.

"-and you'll never ever stop me, because-"

Turn to walk away.

They shoot, they miss.

I keep walking.

They shoot, they hit.

Sigh.

Back.

"-and you'll never ever stop me, because you're not the only one who can go back, you idiot!"

Wait, what?

No Problem

The Hero looked at the map and shrugged.

"Ok, so I grab the tornado and toss it out into space, easy."

The silence that filled the room was enough to pierce The Hero's self-assurance.

"What, we want it to hit the city?"

"Look, even if you can grab a-"

"Oh I can, anything I want to grab I-"

"Look, you can't just remove energy-"

"Sure I can, watch this!"

They flew off and did it before anyone could stop them.

To their credit, they did help in the clean-up after the entire weather system went haywire after they did it.

The Usual Cliches

"I never meant to hurt you, I-"

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"Well, no, but-"

"But you want credit for not actively planning on breaking my heart. You want to be sure that since you're not the worst of the worst, that you get some degree of acceptance?"

"I... No, I'm just explaining-"

"I don't need or want an explanation. Unless you're claiming you were drugged or hypnotised or something?"

"Well...

No."

"And that pause tells me everything I had left to ask. Goodbye then."

"Wait, I-"

"This another cliche?"

His silence was all the answer needed.