Bright Spark

Getting struck by lightning was the most painful moment of my life, so far.

At least, I assume that was what happened. I was heading towards the tree that idiot had gotten under, trying to warn them, and then suddenly I was looking up at the sky, smelling burnt flesh and feeling every inch of my body complaining.

After a moment, I heard their voice.

"OK, just stay there, lightning doesn't strike the same place twice!"

I sat up to tell them that was a myth.

Getting hit by lightning for a second time took the crown from the first.

Lyon, The Master Thief

I woke up to find myself handcuffed to a table, interrogation style, the man across from me wearing sunglasses and a suit only further confirming the situation.

"Ah, good, you're finally awake. Now, I assume you understand why you're here?"

I blinked a few times.

"I don't know who you are, where I am, what's going on, or anything else pertaining to your question!"

"Oh please, just because we captured you easily, Lyon, doesn't mean you can play that card!"

"It's not a card, i don't know this Lyon-"

"How did you know it was with a Y then?"

"What?"

Alexandria's Quest

The Time Traveler, once he was sure he hadn't been spotted, stepped out from around a pillar and approached a man hurriedly sorting certain scrolls into a wooden box.

"Greetings worker! Are the Romans coming?"

The man looked at the Traveller, who was worried his AI translation wasn't working, until the man sighed.

"English, Putonghua, Esperanto, or Spanhinese?"

"Uh, English, but how-"

"Ah, right. So you're here to try and stop the Great Library here from burning?"

"Of course, I-"

The man shot him, finished collecting the scrolls about time travellers in his box and then started a big fire.

Tomoka's Song

I stood on the rooftop, looking down at the concrete below, and prepared to step off.

And then I heard the tune.

It was simple, maybe 20 notes. And it wasn't being performed well.

But it was her tune. The tune she played for me the first night I was in her apartment, the night I truly fell in love with her, and she fell in love with me.

That was enough to pull me back from the brink, as I headed down to find who was playing it.

Turned out to be some Easter egg tune from video games? 

Universe XXX000XXX

After another hour spent trying to convince them I was from another universe, I almost gave up, before trying one last attack.

"OK, you keep telling me the multiverse theory is impossible, why do you think that?"

The supposed scientist chuckled and leaned forward.

"Simple. The theory holds that every possibility, every potential reality exists, yes?"

"I mean, the eggheads back home wouldn't put it like that, but yeah, sure."

"So, if that's true, then there must be a universe that creates a force that would destroy all of us. And since that hasn't-"

"WHY DO YOU THINK I'M HERE?!?"

Lead With Good News

"Soooo, good news-"

"What's the bad news?"

"What?"

"Not a single person starts a sentence about solely good news with that many Os in it. So whatever the bad news is, tell me now, the good can wait."

"Fine, we're heading towards a waterfall."

"YEAH, LEAD WITH THAT FIRST!"

He threw a backhand at me and before I could form a reply he began to paddle furiously, bringing the canoe to the shoreline before breaking it in accidently on rocks.

"OK. Good news?"

"Oh, that I know where we are, and after heading down an easily traversed waterfall we'll arrive."

Kept In Business

I got off my skeleton steed and walked into the printing guild building. I was taken aback when I stepped in, when I was here to place my order for death certificate blanks, there had been two printers printing. Now the room was full of hard working guildmembers, all slaving over their machines.

"Ah, Sir, here!"

One of the clerks called me over, the stack of paper in his hand.

"Rather busy! What, another God change their mind about something?"

"Oh no Sir, a new race has been discovered in the west, so the Legal Drinking Age manuals need updating!"