The Fated Four +1

The Prophecy spoke of the Four Fated Souls, Who Would Stop The Unleashing Of The Eight.

They didn't mention Grodak.

He was from the Northern Kingdoms, a mass of pelts and blades who the Warlock Pyromancer paid to hang around and kill anything that got close to him.

The Four didn't think of him as one of them as such, and Grodak didn't seem to think so.

And neither did the Cultists.

So when the Prophesied Final Battle took place, the Cultists failed to wear stab-proof armor.

But maybe because the temple collapse claimed Grodak, that's why he wasn't mentioned?

Miss Fire

I was at the bar with a couple friends, and as usual, Christie was pushing me to go talk to a lady at the other end of the bar. I don't know if my drink was stronger than usual, but in an effort to shut her up, I walked over, and tried to begin to talk before apologising for wasting her time before I headed back to my friend group.

Christie began to chew me out until the other woman came over, Christie looking smug until this other woman angrily asked why I thought I had a shot with her.

Only On Deluxe Editions

I booted up the program, and as I'd done a thousand times before, I checked my phone as I waited for the ad to play.

Except nothing played.

I looked up, worried it suddenly had gotten eye tracking in an update or something, but no, it was just sitting there, waiting for an advertisement to load.

I gave it a few minutes before I rebooted, only to load it up and get the same problem.

I looked it up, and found a message that they had no advertisers lined up, but once they did, it'd work again, don't you worry.

Texas Hold Out

I woke up when they slapped my face a few times. Once I got my bearings, I began to plead for my freedom before one of the men shut me up.

"Just deal the game."

I blinked and saw I was tied down to a chair next to a damaged but usable poker table.

"What?"

"We're playing for... Never mind what, but we need a neutral party to deal. That's you."

I swallowed, then picked up the cards.

"Well..

Wait, these are marked, see here?"

Afterwards, I realised I should have worked out who held the key before I lied.

Dragon Proof

For a period of time that for reasons that will quickly become obvious, keeping accurate records of the land was hard, due to the dragons. Paper and parchment would burn, metal plates would melt, and stone tablets...

Ok, they were usually safe, but hard to move about.

It was just accepted that this was how things were, life and knowledge were temporary.

But eventually, someone did manage to work out that dragons could be communicated with, and negotiated with.

After that, it was just a matter of explaining to them how information was valuable and could be hoarded, but shared.

Saved Relationship

There's not a generally accepted term, at least not yet, for when two people fall in love during a life/death situation. When they barely know each other at the start but by the point they save the world, they can't wait to get into each other's pants.

Not that Mike and Lucy cared to name anything, beyond a hypothetical offspring as they began to explore a life together post-world saving.

But despite their not being a name for it, most people agree that the heightened emotions don't lead to a stable relationship.

Theirs didn't last, but did last enough.

Four Stages

The end of the world came in four stages.

Obviously the initial impact of the thing was the first stage, as it quickly became clear what was going to happen.

The second stage was the inevitable outcome of many people who were survivors of the initial stage seeing what was coming and opting out of the third stage.

The third stage was painful, as those last few who refused to give in fought as hard as they could for as long as they could.

The fourth stage, well, the start of the new world means the end of the other...

Strangest Thing

The fact that I'd had a bad feeling about the day from the moment I woke up wasn't the strangest thing.

The fact that I suffered a dozen minor delays in trying to get to work wasn't the strangest thing, or things if you wanted to count them separately.

The fact that I bumped into the strangely dressed man as I went to walk through the door wasn't the strangest thing, nor the words he said.

And, surprisingly, the fact that I suddenly found myself in ancient times wasn't the strangest thing.

No, the strangest thing was the working wifi.

University Careers

The Unleashing that had given Glory all her powers had impacted the entire student body at LFU, but not everyone was equal. For every Solstar or Mrs Anderson, there was Anthtos, who couldn't die, but sure wished she could. Or Joe, who could bleed on command. (Useful for pro wrestling though.)

But Tempo? He thought he got pretty lucky, he was just able to play anything as a musical instrument, meant he had a career without an obvious obligation for heroism.

Until he discovered Lutar, who was the world's greatest hand-to-hand fighter, provided she had a beat to move to...

Death By Violence

I was given the choice between peace via surrender and death through violence.

I chose violence.

The first few waves were seemingly unprepared for someone to pick that and fight back, or at least fight back as hard as I did.

But then they got smart, attacking from different angles at the same time, trying to flank and surprise me.

I got through several more waves of them, enough that I could tell they were pulling out big guns.

And when they finally did get their strongest weapon out, that's when the orbital strike I'd ordered finally hit my position.

Dead Man's Peak

The story got around the bars across the west, that there was a fortune in gold up on Dead Man's Peak, but it was guarded by the ghost of the Dead Man the peak was referring to.

Most everyone just put it down to more taradiddles, but occasionally a 'scientist' would head up for the ghost, and slightly more often a desperate man would go up for the gold.

And they'd never return, only furthering the reach of the story.

Still, if you wanted cheap treasure hunting gear or weird science tools, the local general store was always fully stocked.

ID Check

The Inn on the outskirts of the Demon Lands did a decent trade, as there was always an adventuring party or two heading in to stop a demon or destroy a cursed item, and they usually wanted to drink heavily before they faced that.

Originally, the owner had a a huge book filled with every race and subrace in the lands, and would cross-reference people to their minimum drinking age before their order. But then he got a magic crystal installed over the door that announced races and ages upon entry.

Until the shapeshifter was discovered and reacted rather badly.

The Impact Of Propaganda

As a kid, he'd watched the holomovies that were made "With the kind assistance of the Intersystem Police Agency" with his brother and thought the various heroes were so cool, and by the time he understood the concept of propaganda, he was already in the Junior Future Officer program.

But as he studied and trained, his childlike enthusiasm had wained, but he still dreamed of the day he would get to say a cool one-liner after a criminal died.

When he finally got the chance, he was too busy crying over how he'd been forced to shoot his brother dead.

Drink

I stared at the bottle.

3 months, 2 weeks, 5 days, 14 hours... 35 minutes.

That was when I had my last drink.

I wasn't so stupid as to think I'd broken the addiction, I was pretty sure that I'd never truly do that, I'd just learn to avoid it.

Nor did I think I deserved a drink, that I'd somehow earned it.

But right now, at this point... I needed to just not feel... Anything.

I reached out a trembling hand, and accidently knocked it off to the floor.

I sighed, shaking my head as I got a broom. 

Alternate Path

Glory thought she understood what Cauldron was doing when he said he'd find an alternate universe version of her to help, but after about 90 seconds, she spoke.

"How long is this gonna take?"

"I'm trying to find one just as powerful as you and equally morally good."

"And this is hard?"

His silence was deafening.

"Look, can you let me see?"

He waved his hand, and Glory could see through the multiverse. A moment later, she pulled a half dozen Glorys out.

"Go kill that giant and you can stay here."

Cauldron glanced at their home universes and shuddered.

Grenade

The G67 Fragmentation Grenade was an old model, but it was still used because it was reliable. Totally safe until you pulled the pin, at which point you had exactly 5 seconds before it was very much not safe.

I was up to three seconds.

Time, sadly, did not slow for me, so I didn't have a long moment (relatively) to work out what to do. All I had was my reflexes.

And it turns out they decided to grab the thing and toss it back.

The other notable fact about the grenade was, like every grenade, it wasn't partisan.

Phil

Glory, one of the Earth's most powerful superheros, had learnt how to read Phil fairly well. Phil (he never told anyone his real name) could loop the day on demand. Most days, he was as surprised as anyone else about what was about to happen.

Some days, he'd make a quip right as she was about to, and she knew this was a danger situation.

And some days, he didn't have time for jokes, and those were the days she had to focus hard on.

But today, he's just staring at her, as if trying to memorise how she looks...

Be Nice If It Was

I'll admit that this isn't the most pressing fear I have, but when you scattershot ideas out as much as I do here, there are plenty I've shoved into 100 words and pushed out and promptly forgotten about. This has led to me plagiarising myself, which is one of the few things I have in common with John Fogerty, but the fear is this.

You never know what idea will end up connecting with someone and they'll need to hear more, or understand something about it.

And I'll be here with no idea.

But as I said, not exactly pressing.

Counting Bullets

When I put the gun to his head, he laughed.

"Not the reaction I was expecting, not gonna lie."

That just made him laugh harder.

"If this is some sort of trick to get me to pause while you wait for a miracle, it's working I guess, but not for much longer."

He forced himself to stop laughing.

"No, no, just the idea you're gonna shoot me, that's not gonna happen, girl!"

I pulled the trigger, and the gun clicked.

"You gotta start counting bullets."

"And you should have counted guns." I replied, as I pulled my other gun out.

I Dream

The genie was surprisingly helpful about explaining the rules, specifically the last one that wasn't part of the usual set.

"OK, so, if I can't wish for anything that interferes or invalidates a previous wish, would my wish be wasted if it did?"

"No no, you just can't wish it."

"And you can't tell me what the other wishes have been, you just tell me no?"

"Correct."

"OK. 

I wish for enough money to live off for a thousand years."

"Granted."

"I wish for perfect health until I choose otherwise."

"Granted."

"And I wish for no more wishes."

"...

Oh.

Granted."

Chatbot

 "Hello and welcome to Happy Burger, can I-"

"Human."

The voice box paused for a moment.

"Hey, I might be an Artificial Intelligence Chatbot, but I'm more than capable of taking your order, so what-"

"Human."

Another pause.

"I'm sorry, I didn't quite get that, can you-"

"Human."

Another pause.

"Do you mean a Happy Combo? We habe it in regular, large, biggy, or-"

"Human."

A much longer pause, then a voice that sounded a lot tireder and over things spoke.

"Hey, order?"

"Human."

"I'm Human dude."

"No, Human!"

The longest pause.

"We don't sell Human here."

The customer left.

The Key To Locks

The key to being able to unlock any lock is knowing the way to open it.

I understand that sounds patronising, not to mention verging on dad joke with the key thing, but it's true.

If a lock has a single password that never changes, then the human in the chain is the key. If it changes on a regular basis, you just need to force a change when you have access. If it's random and computerised, then it's back to the human who controls the computer.

If it's a physics lock, then Bob is the key.

He's my locksmith.

Know Your Audience

I had to summarise what he was telling me back to him, to convince myself I hadn't misheard him.

"So you and this Doctor Misama have battled across the multiverse-"

"Correct."

"And you've been finding universes that ate fictional in various other universes, because that's the best way to get powerful enemies."

"Right."

"And you just want this to end."

"Yes. So is there a fictional universe in this world with an immortal warrior who fights for justice?"

I sighed.

"I can give you one better."

I grabbed a pen and made a one page comic about inevitable, unavoidable entropy. 

Exact Details

"And lo, the prophecy says that only one born of two mothers can-"

"Who said this?"

The cleric paused.

"What?"

"Who made this prophecy?"

"The past head priests of our God-"

"And how do they know anything?"

"Because they are in communion with our God, now can I get-"

"So why not be specfic?"

"How many people do you know with two mothers?"

"A few, actually, which is my point, why not name the person, or give details on how to do it?"

"Our God-"

"If you invoke free will I'm leaving."

"Is at war, hence secrecy."

"OK, that works."

Escape

Every day, I needed to know that there was a chance I could get out of the rut. I needed that possibility, no matter how low, that I could escape.

So, on my way home from the job grinding the life out of me, every night, I'd duck into the tiny shop on the corner and buy a scratch ticket.

Every time, I told the woman behind the counter that this was my way out. And every day, it just wasn't.

But I eventually did find my escape in that shop.

It was just a matter of seeing her properly.