Mature Attitude

I was sipping my soda while waiting for my ride, when he stopped in front of me. He was older, white, kindly looking.

"You know, if you switched to water, you would probably lose weight."

I took one long breath, and looked up at him.

"Do you honestly think that I'm so stupid that such a thought wouldn't have occured to me? That because you think I'm overweight, I must be an idiot?

And anyway, what the hell gives you the right to comment on my size?"

He pulled out his phone, and my ride was suddenly cancelled.

"Real mature."

Easygoing

I got into the elevator on the eighty-fifth floor.

She got in on the eighty-third.

I saw her eyes widen as she got in, but then she had turned around to stare at the doors, obviously hoping to just ignore the moment. But I was always the one to plow through such moments.

"I see you finally got that jacket."

She took a deep breath, the type I recognised.

"For your information, my fiancé got it for me!"

"Oh, congratulations!"

"For fuck's sake, this is why I dumped you! Can't you be jealous or something?"

"No" I said, lying effortlessly.

Game Over

I would have bet that when I died, that would be it. And I suppose I had done exactly that.

It wasn't pearly gates, or lakes of fire, but instead a desk, a small mound of paperwork, and a studious looking... shape.

"Having completed your stint, please sign these documents."

I didn't so much hear the words as I felt them in what was whatever the equivalent of my brain.

"Don't I get a chance to play a game or something to get more time?"

"You did, that's life."

"You mean-"

"No, not the one with the little plastic cars."

Starlight, Starbright

The journey out to the Caodage system had taken three months, during which, while I'd been in stasis, the computers had been calculating the data needed to get it right.

Once I'd unfrozen and gotten back to full capacity, I had a week to prepare and launch.

I prepared the device and shot it towards the star, and set a course for the next system.

It would supernova after I'd left, as I hopped back home, all the supernovas spelling out my marriage proposal to her in the night sky. That would make up for the hundred years of freezing.

Swordsmith

She made every blade with the same level of care and reverence that one would expect from a master swordsmith, despite the fact that, as a woman, her blades were considered automatically inferior.

But she knew, thanks to the prophecy, that a weapon she would make would save the land from a great evil. She didn't know which blade it would be, so she made them all the best she could, while still marrying and having children and a happy enough life.

When she died, and she found out the weapon would be her son, she was rather put out.

Caught Out

"I want to make it clear from the outset that there was no intention to hurt anyone."

"Duly noted."

"Likewise, I wish to also make clear that at no stage did I do anything illegal."

"Your opinion has been recorded."

"It's not an opinion!

But fine, now that we've established that, I don't quite know where to begin here. What exactly do you want to know?"

"Who killed Gary Strauss?"

"Gary Strauss is dead?"

"What did you think we were here to ask you about?"

"My affair with-

No-one."

"So you had motive?"

"Yes, but-

Fuck."

"That's the problem, yes."

Named Glitter

The driver cast a quick cantrip, the magic mouth inside the carriage speaking.

"Goldhorde, next stop!"

She perked up and stuck her head out the window for a moment, then pulled it back in, her face crestfallen.

"What's the problem?"

"I thought it would be gold! Why call a city Goldhorde if it's just boring brown?"

The carriage shook mightily. She once again stuck her head out the window.

"That would be Gold, the dragon who rules the city as its horde."

"Why is a black dragon called Gold?"

I understood why the driver turned around away from the fight.