Quite The Education

The Barbarian had forced his way into the library's inner sanctum, but rather than attacking the wise people and stealing anything shiny, he bellowed he wanted to talk to the wisest about life and its meaning.

The oldest philosophy deepthinker got his attention, sat him down, and they had a quiet conversation for several hours.

Eventually The Barbarian left. The second oldest philosophy deepthinker asked the oldest if he taught the beast anything.

"Actually, he taught me much about what he learned in the afterlife.

Plus what it's like to make love to a dozen princesses at once. Very nice."

Get You Going

The robot would roll past my door just before I'd leave for work, every day. I didn't pay it much mind, every public space large enough to accumulate grime had a cleaning robot, what was one more?

Then came the day where, my morning stabilisers were, I found out later, contaminated due to a leak in one of the pipes to my pod. At the time, I was just feeling terrible and struggling to get ready, when the robot paused and knocked.

When I finally opened the door, it offered what looked like a stabiliser.

It was a rebels wake-uper.

Only Natural

"Putting aside the issue of the beaver dam-"

"Putting aside? Why are we putting aside the entire point of this adjudication, he put the beavers-"

"Because we need to discuss the issue of the mice."

"Mice? What mice?"

"The mice you put into my property!"

"Oh what nonsense, I never-"

"I have the report here of the independent nature investigator. He assures me that both the beavers and the mice have made their homes naturally, thus no-one is at fault for anything. Now, he could investigate further, if you want."

"Uh, no, fine."

"I'd like that."

"Oh good, you're innocent."

Just Vs Karma

In his anger, he picked up a sledgehammer,  screamed something incoherently, and put the hammer through the wall.

Given the argument was about the cost of the renovations, the cosmically just thing would have been for there to be some sort of treasure or cash cache behind it. That didn't happen.

Having him smash a wire and get several thousand volts through him would have been karmic, in a way. That didn't happen.

Instead, the hole revealed the nest of termites in the wall. Which was good to find, sure, but also added more costs.

So a little of both.

Curated

It appeared on my curated page, some sort of video about a tree, I didn't actually watch it. I was more concerned about how I was apparently a follower of the creator.

The name meant nothing to me, and there weren't any other videos on their channel.

So, I unfollowed and went about my day.

When I brought my page up later that night, I got a sort of answer when I saw all the posts asking what the hell that tree video that they watched was about.

Funnily enough, all those accounts were silent from the next morning on.

Post Apocalypse

When it comes to the apocalypse and what will you do afterwards, there are a few camps of thinking.

There are plenty of people who are eager to think they'll be among the survivors are are sure they'll have the skills and equipment to survive and thrive.

A few people are smart enough to play the odds and assume they'll die during it.

And others are sure it won't happen, which means they'll probably end up in the second group.

Me? I don't care what happens after the Apocalypse, I just want to be the one to start it, really.

Nachos Aesthetic

I had a big pile of nachos in front of me, on a large plate that was almost holding them all.

I began to pick at it, taking chips that didn't disturb the aesthetic, making sure that it still looked like a pleasant, somewhat big pile of nachos before me.

But at a certain point, I was stuck. There were no chips left that could be removed and keep things pretty. So I had to ruin the aesthetic, to keep eating.

Or, I could just make more nachos and add them on top.

I did that, for the ninth time.