Crowning Moment

The Jewelled Crown of Minorly was the symbol of everything the Wastefield Tribes despised, the Kingdom’s order, wealth, the rule of law. Thus, naturally, when the two sides went to war, the Kingdom made sure the Crown was well protected, lest it fall into the hands of the Tribes.

But there was at least one master thief who valued money over the Kingdom.

After the Crown was stolen, the Kingdom was on high alert, almost every citizen was loyal and searched for it.

The Kingdom assumed it would be smuggled out to the Tribes.

Blowing it up, that surprised them.

A Question Of Ruling

As I began work on my time machine, the United States of America began to wobble, just a bit. The day I finished was the day it descended into anarchy.

I knew I had to do something, but the problem was that the chaos of America’s downfall had far too many causes, plus America did too much good prior.

So I went a fair way back, and managed to convince Mr. Washington to become King George the First.

I had assumed, on my return trip, The Kingdom of America would be more stable.

The American Empire was stable, I suppose…

The Family Bluff

The will named all four children as executors. Thus, the four of them were forced to catalogue their Mother’s belongings before they could distribute them. And since three of them couldn’t stand the sight of any of the others, this was a long process.

Eventually the youngest and sweetest one broke, and said she was out of here, she’d just take her Mother’s locket.

The others almost fell for the trick of thinking a useless trinket was worth vast sums, but they laughed and sent her on her way with the locket.

And the key to the safety deposit boxes.

The Worst I Got

All of the Custodians of Earth, together, could destroy any threat on the planet, and could defeat most threats from off the planet.

Threats from outside this existence though...

An hour after The Leveler declared it would destroy the planet for power, the Custodians were fighting a seemingly never ending swarm of themselves, from a thousand other universes.

But their hearts were pure, and the Custodians won.

“That the best you got?” Glory shouted, defiant, as The Leveler raised an eyebrow.

“No, that was just the easiest.”

The Leveler closed its eyes, and began to erase the Custodians from existence.

Checking The Figure

I smiled as she walked in the door. I went to apologize but she cut me off.

“This is the tenth straight time in your first week that you’ve called me down here just to check your figures. If you ask me to check your figures again, I am so firing you. Clear?”

I weighed my feelings.

“Actually I wanted to ask you out…” I mumbled, telling the truth for the first time. She paused.

“I don’t date co-workers.”

“Can you check my figures?”

“You’re fired.”

“Can I pick you up at 8?”

“I will pick you up at 7.”

Feeling Death Like

On my eighth birthday, when the principal pulled me out of class, I felt like death, awaiting whatever punishment I must have earned.

When she told me about the car crash, my parents, well that made the earlier death feel like joy in comparison.

On my eighteenth birthday, when Priscilla pulled me to a quiet corner of the party, I felt amazing, as I knew she’d finally decided to sleep with me.

When she dumped me, that felt like death all over again.

On my twenty-eighth birthday, I actually felt death, for a few seconds.

The other two were worse.

Writing From Experience

As a famous and, more importantly, successful writer, Leo had rote answers to a few questions that he was constantly asked.

The most common one had a few variations, but in the end, came down to the same basic idea.

“Tell me how to write like you.”

Whenever someone asked him anything along those lines, he said the same thing.

“Write what you know.”

And that would get a laugh, since Leo’s bibliography was half high fantasy, half hard science fiction.

But it wasn’t a joke, he truly meant it.

He just was lucky enough to remember his other lives.