New Year’s Eve

She stared into the mirror, condensation dripping down the reflective surface, making it look like a tear was running down her cheek, matching her mood perfectly.

This had been a horrible year for her. Seemingly every aspect of her life was worse off than it was three hundred and sixty five days previously.

Lost her job, got a crappier one. This of course meant she was further in debt, which directly led to her nasty break up…

But the new year, she had to make a change.

Eve decided that this would be a new year, and a new her…

His Evil Twin

I met him on top of Mt Chaos, where the Warrior’s Guide teleported me right in time to help him defeat the Daemon Master and retrieve Saxion’s Bracelet.

Fifteen minutes later, we were attacked by a summoned Bladewind. I managed to defeat it, but he received a mortal wound to the throat. He was just able to croak out a warning to look out for his twin, then died.

I protected the Bracelet constantly, and took care to not let any man come near it, for fear of a good disguise.

Except he had a fraternal twin, a twin sister…

Power Conduits

Ever since the Empowered began to admit their existence, I’ve been studying them. Sure, they’ve all used their powers for good, but you never know when they might turn on us.

And I quickly noticed how they all needed a conduit for their powers. They needed a special pair of shoes to fly, they needed a certain pair of gloves to shoot ice beams, they needed specific sunglasses for laser vision.

Thus, all we needed to do was ensure that they were only given these items when doing a mission, and we’d be safe.

And then along came Mr. Imagination…

The Worst Customers

A group of six people walked into the store.

The little old lady who never shuts up.

The angry loudmouth who insists that every price is wrong.

The slimy ‘ladies man’ who tells me I have nice tits and then expects get a discount.

The annoying prick who has to price compare everything on his phone.

And the indecisive moron who takes an hour to make a choice but who also gets uppity if you try and help him.

I had hoped the sixth would be good, but considering he was the robber, I guess he was worst of all.

Golem Remote

Once I made sure that the flesh golem wasn’t going to stand back up, I prised open the treasure chest. I had been hoping for a new magic shield, but all I found was a small box. I picked it up, and my thumb brushed one of the gold buttons inlaid into it.

The remains of the flesh golem behind me began to jerk, as if trying to fulfil an order.

I was going to leave it, but the engraving was decent, thought I could sell it as scrap.

Almost did, before I found out it was a universal remote…

Boxing Day

I was always warned that the day your last child leaves the nest was a morose one. I started off believing that, but then as my children were born and then grew up, I started to look forward to the day when my wife and I were left alone.

Now that the day has come when we’re going to be alone though, I’m feeling terribly. I know I should go downstairs, but right now all I want to do is sit here, and look through Daniel’s baby clothing.

Eventually though, I know I’ll have to go down to Daniel’s wake…

Santa Claus

When he pulled up in an old Mercury Comet, I was livid.

“You were supposed to be here an hour ago!”

“There was traffic at the airport-“

“Whatever, whatever just get in there and sit down… Nice beard.”

To the guy’s credit, he was pretty good at it. Every kid walked away happy, even the ones that were led to him bawling their eyes out.

At the end, I had his pay, minus the missing hour, but he waved if off, saying something about ‘keeping his game strong’.

I was disappointed when his car didn’t fly away. Not sure why.