It was a beautiful summer’s evening, the night I faked my own death.
I’d gone into the evening expecting a night of light drinking, nice conversation, maybe even a little dancing if I met a nice girl.
Well, I certainly met a girl. She was so far drunk she should have come round to sober again.
So I dragged her to the curb, but she wouldn’t let go, so I jumped in front of a car and pretended it hit me.
She staggered off at that point, bawling her eyes out.
The ambulance driver on the other hand was cute…